Missing shards and cracked clay....
It's Saturday...the morning after the shooting in Conneticut where 26 lives were cut short.....I sit in my friend's living room, numb and asking God for comfort...all I could think about were the children in my life and how much I just wanted to hold them. So, what follows is just my processing from that morning....
"The eyes of the Lord are in every place,
watching the evil and the good." Proverbs 15:3
Da- you see- you do not stand aside or turn away or ignore...You see and your heart is broken and filled with grief and pain. Your arms ache to hold, your throat tightens with a voice clogged and the wail of anguish is so deep there is no sound. You long for the invitation...to be allowed in, to be given permission to enter.
You see and when invited, you rush in like a refreshing breeze in a stifled place and in your gentleness you pick up the broken pieces and hold them in your hands. Your heart's eye sees the orginal masterpiece and though you are saddened by the result of destruction you, being the Creator, begin to slowly smile. A light burns in your eyes and with the kindness of unfamthomable grace and mercy, instead of throwing away the broken work, you sit down and with new clay you begin to put back together the broken pieces.
You see- you do not stand aside or turn away or ignore...You wait for an invitation. You see- the shards that were stolen and grieve, but you also see the pieces that remain and you fit them together and fill in the cracks and smooth the rough jagged edges- soon the piece takes shape. It is not exactly like the old, but it does resemble it. Now it has new, stronger lines, deeper ridges, longer curves and higher sides. It's capacity for use has grown and become more versatile. It is the same core, but yet an almost completely different functional piece.
You see- you set it aside for a short time to harden the new clay- allowing the pieces to join, settle and the permanence of change- to rest a little. Then you wait. Time, just a little, just enough- you have a plan- there will be a firing in the kiln and the finish will be immaculate but first some decorating on the outside, a little paint and polish to lighten some of the clay color and a little joy in the anticipation of all the possibilities available to make this piece all it could be.
You see. You wait. Time. The cracks are still visible, but no longer weak or raw, in the right light and at the right angle you can tell they are there. They are no longer the focal point of the piece. They are a reminder now of the masterful work of grace and mercy, of the broken heart, tight throated anguish that once was and has now been turned to joy, to wholeness, to hope.
You see it all, and though I don't understand why I have peace. You see and I know I can trust. You see and because you see I have hope.
